True Headlines. Utterly Absurd.
Opening the desk…
The Drive
Here's what the "E15 Fuel Waiver" means, and everything you need to know about ethanol in
UNITED STATES, March 27 — This week, Lee Zeldin’s EPA announced “approving nationwide E15,” pitching it as “fortifying the domestic fuel supply. ” What that means exactly is that the federal government will allow more stations to cut gasoline with ethanol , which, yes, makes it cheaper, but it also yields See more
NBC Boston
Jerry Murrell made the decision to give the money to his employees after a botched birthda
UNITED STATES, March 27 — Five Guys CEO Jerry Murrell is putting his money where his mouth is — for a rather eyebrow-raising reason. Murrell gave a phone interview to Fortune on March 25 about the company’s 40th anniversary BOGO offer in February, which quickly became much more popular than the chain had See more
Financial Post
Iran has likely earned hundreds of millions of dollars of extra income from oil sales sinc
CA, March 26 — Iran has likely earned hundreds of millions of dollars of extra income from oil sales since the start of the war , benefiting from a surge in the price of its crude after it became the only major exporter able to use the Strait of Hormuz . See more
AP News
The Associated Press is an independent global news organization dedicated to factual repor
UNITED STATES, March 26 — Menu World SECTIONS Iran war Russia-Ukraine war Español China Asia Pacific Latin America Europe Africa TOP STORIES Iran rejects US ceasefire plan, issues its own demands as strikes land across the Mideast LIVE Trump’s potential troop deployment is getting pushback on Capitol Hill See more
Boston.com
Residents and community leaders point to culture, opportunity, and connection as reasons L
UNITED STATES, March 25 — When Henry Marte s landlord offered him a five-year lease on his Lowell loft, he didn t think twice. In the past, I ve never really found a place that I would commit to staying for so long, and without hesitation, I was like, Where do I sign? See more
CNBC
Apollo , the asset management giant, told investors in its flagship private credit fund th
UNITED STATES, March 24 — Apollo , the asset management giant, told investors in its flagship private credit fund that it will limit withdrawals this quarter to just under half of requests, the latest sign of stress in the asset class. See more
Hindustan Metro
SVCV Global is undeniably one of the most interesting and audacious new entrants in the wo
INDIA, March 20 — A Promising Prospect with a Steep Climb Ahead. A new super group is just arriving swingling just around the corner and is becoming the word of the town before it has even fully launched yet. See more
BBC News
A businessman who deliberately paid a parking ticket fine because it was cheaper than payi
LONDON, March 20 — A businessman who deliberately paid a parking ticket fine because it was cheaper than paying to use a multi-storey car park in the city centre, has accused NCP of "profiteering". See more
BBC
The US is weighing lifting sanctions on some Iranian oil, as it scrambles to contain the i
LONDON, March 20 — The US is weighing lifting sanctions on some Iranian oil, as it scrambles to contain the impact of its war in Iran on energy markets. Treasury Secretary Scott Bessent put forward the idea in a Fox interview, saying it could make more oil available to global buyers. See more
The Drive
The owner was involved in a collision that damaged the wiring harness in November 2024. It
UNITED STATES, March 19 — Usually, when people buy a new vehicle, they plan on driving it. John Rice from New Hampshire was no different when he purchased a Chevy Silverado ZR2 in 2024. See more
The Independent
A Black tech executive is suing her former employer over racial discrimination she claims
GB, March 18 — A Black tech executive is suing her former employer over racial discrimination she claims she encountered on the job, including a Juneteenth greeting from a company director who allegedly wished her a “Happy no longer being a slave day,” according to a federal civil rights lawsui See more
BBC
An 18-year-old woman said she was left frustrated after being told she could not be shortl
GB, March 17 — An 18-year-old woman said she was left frustrated after being told she could not be shortlisted for a trainee role at an estate agency because her car was too old. See more
ED Times
Recently, an unusual idea has been gaining attention across India: the claim that the gove
INDIA, March 17 — When people think of starting a business, the usual ideas are opening a shop, launching a food stall, or setting up a small manufacturing unit.
Livestock farming rarely comes to mind. See more
404 Media
The CEO of Krafton used ChatGPT to push out the head of the studio developing Subnautica 2
UNITED STATES, March 17 — The Monday ruling details the bizarre story. Unknown Worlds Entertainment is the studio behind the 2018 underwater survival game Subnautica .
The company has since been working on the sequel, Subnautica 2 . See more
The Register
Workers who believe "leveraging cross-functional synergies" sounds profound may want to re
LONDON, March 16 — Researchers from Cornell University have developed what they call "the Corporate Bullshit Receptivity Scale," a tool designed to measure how impressed people are by business school-style jargon that sounds strategic but says very little. See more
CNBC
Meta's stock climbed after Reuters reported the social media giant is planning to lay off
UNITED STATES, March 16 — Meta stock climbed about 3% on Monday, following what it called "speculative" reports that the company is planning to lay off over 20% of its workforce to balance its big artificial intelligence spending plans this year. See more
CNBC
Treasury Secretary Scott Bessent told CNBC that the U.S. is allowing Iranian oil tankers t
UNITED STATES, March 16 — The United States is allowing Iranian oil tankers to transit the Strait of Hormuz, Treasury Secretary Scott Bessent told CNBC on Monday. "The Iranian ships have been getting out already, and we've let that happen to supply the rest of the world," Bessent told CNBC's Brian Sulliva See more
Federal Reserve Board
The Federal Reserve Board on Friday announced the execution of enforcement actions against
UNITED STATES, March 15 — The Federal Reserve Board on Friday announced the execution of the enforcement actions listed below: Consent prohibition order against Cassandra Grayson Former employee of Equity Bank, Andover, Kansas Embezzlement of bank funds Consent prohibition order against Sandra Adams Forme See more
KSL.com
Sesame Workshop sued SeaWorld for withholding royalties and damaging the "Sesame Street" b
UNITED STATES, March 15 — NEW YORK — Sesame Workshop, known for the iconic children's TV show "Sesame Street," sued SeaWorld on Thursday to end their decades-long relationship, accusing the theme park operator of withholding royalties and undermining the "Sesame Street" brand. See more
CoverSentry
A deep dive into how applicant tracking systems filter, rank, and lose resumes before a re
UNITED STATES, March 14 — ATS & RESUME SCREENING DATA ATS Statistics: Why Your Resume Disappears Into the Void (2026) A deep dive into how applicant tracking systems filter, rank, and lose resumes before a recruiter even sees them.
🤖 98% of Fortune 500 companies use an Applicant Tracking System. See more
ABC News
Australian fashion designer Katie Perry has won her High Court battle with international p
AU, March 11 — Australian fashion designer Katie Perry has won her High Court battle with international pop star Katy Perry in a long-running trademark case.
The dispute over the name began in 2009, when the singer was preparing for her Hello Katy Australian tour. See more
CNBC
OpenAI is walking away from expanding its flagship Stargate data center with Oracle becaus
UNITED STATES, March 10 — Artificial intelligence chips are getting upgraded more quickly than data centers can be built, a market reality that exposes a key risk to the AI trade and Oracle's debt-fueled expansion. See more
CBS News
United amended its so-called contract of carriage, which outlines the carrier's rules and
UNITED STATES, March 7 — United Airlines is taking steps to limit noise in its planes' cabins, while still allowing travelers to use their personal electronic devices.
United amended its so-called contract of carriage, which outlines the carrier's rules and policies, to require that all passengers wear h See more
TVP World
The United States is reportedly considering lifting sanctions on Russian oil as a potentia
POLAND, March 7 — The United States is reportedly considering lifting sanctions on Russian oil as a potential measure to stabilize global energy markets amid escalating tensions in the Middle East, according to a report by Bloomberg. See more
AP News
The U.S. government has issued a license authorizing transactions related to the sale of V
UNITED STATES, March 7 — Menu World SECTIONS Iran war Russia-Ukraine war Español China Asia Pacific Latin America Europe Africa TOP STORIES LIVE Russia has provided Iran with information that can help Tehran strike US military, AP sources say Trump rules out talks absent Iran's 'unconditional surrender' See more
Aftermath
Nintendo of America is suing the United States government over tariffs imposed by Presiden
UNITED STATES, March 7 — Nintendo of America is suing the United States government over the sweeping tariffs President Donald Trump put in place last year, according to a complaint filed Friday in the U. See more
Variety
With David Ellison ‘s media company poised to snap up CNN’s parent company, Warner Bros. D
UNITED STATES, March 6 — Skydance Will Paramount Skydance turn CNN into a right-leaning Fox News 2. See more
A.V. Club
Paramount Skydance CEO David Ellison wants to assuage fears about the new media landscape
UNITED STATES, March 6 — The star of Flyboys and Hole In One wants you to know that the news is safe in his hands. David Ellison, the billionaire son of Oracle founder Larry Ellison, the sixth richest man on Earth, is in the process of buying yet another media conglomerate, his second in less than a year See more
View from the Wing
Southwest Airlines is experimenting with having cabin cleaners come on their planes betwee
UNITED STATES, March 5 — Southwest Airlines is experimenting with having cabin cleaners come on their planes between flights to clean only the premium extra legroom seat areas of the aircraft. See more
Dayton Daily News
Consumers allege injuries from products from Amazon, Home Depot, Fitbit, other companies.
UNITED STATES, March 5 — A Warren County man claims his Fitbit smartwatch overheated, causing serious burns to his wrist. A Dayton woman says she was hurt when a portable power station she bought on Amazon exploded. See more
404 Media
For a few hours on Tuesday, Polymarket hosted a bet about the possibility of nuclear war i
UNITED STATES, March 4 — ‘How ghoulish. ’ The depravity economy moves into the nuclear war business. US Department of Energy photo. For a few hours on Tuesday, Polymarket hosted a bet about the possibility of nuclear war in 2026.
The market asked the question “Nuclear weapon detonation by …? See more
The Nerd Stash
Burger King’s president took things to a whole new level after McDonald’s CEO and Chairman
UNITED STATES, March 4 — Corporate rivalries don’t get more delicious than this. Fast food chains are always battling for the top spot, but Burger King’s president took things to a whole new level, and he did it with mayo smeared right across his face. See more
Westword
The Coffee Joint was the first licensed consumption venue in the country. Now the owner wa
UNITED STATES, March 4 — The Coffee Joint made history in 2018 when it became the country’s first licensed cannabis lounge , but the Denver venue took its last sip on February 25.
Now, it’s on to mushrooms. See more
The Drive
When Toyota's leadership didn't understand why it needed bigger cars for America, designer
UNITED STATES, March 3 — Every monolith starts somewhere. Forty years ago, Toyota was certainly a challenger, but it was not yet a colossus. Back then, the company claimed 8% of the world’s car market; for reference, Ford owned 12.
5% and General Motors, 19%. See more
Variety
Paramount Skydance plans to combine Paramount+ and HBO Max into one streaming service, upo
UNITED STATES, March 3 — Paramount Skydance plans to combine Paramount+ and HBO Max into one streaming service, upon the completion of the merger between Paramount and Warner Bros. See more
CoverSentry
By 2026, most hiring professionals have encountered AI-generated applications. Here's the
UNITED STATES, March 2 — Hiring Managers Detecting AI in Applications (2024–2026) DETECTION Encounter rate over time The AI trust gap Detection has climbed steadily from 53% to 77% across two years of surveys, yet a dramatic trust divide persists. See more
KSL.com
Quality Plating, a Salt Lake City business since 1955, will close in March. Founded by Wal
UNITED STATES, March 2 — SALT LAKE CITY — In little more than a month, Quality Plating, a west side Salt Lake business that over the past 71 years has attached metal plating to just about anything — from bronzing Gene Fullmer's boxing gloves to applying gold siding to the space shuttle — will be closing See more
AP News
The Food and Drug Administration plans to offer bonus payments to staffers who complete sp
UNITED STATES, March 1 — The Food and Drug Administration plans to offer bonus payments to staffers who complete speedy drug reviews.
BBC
A pub which was told selling a pint of beer for 25p during a promotion was "irresponsible"
GB, February 28 — Leeds city centre pub Whitelocks offered customers their first pint of revived 1970s pale ale brand Double Diamond at the retro price as part of the four-day scheme, which began on Thursday. See more
BBC News
Leeds city centre pub Whitelocks offered customers their first pint of revived 1970s pale
GB, February 28 — A pub which was told selling a pint of beer for 25p during a promotion was "irresponsible" and a breach of its licence has instead begun giving them away.
Leeds city centre pub Whitelocks offered customers their first pint of revived 1970s pale ale brand Double Diamond at the ret See more