True Headlines. Utterly Absurd.
Composing this edition…
True Headlines. Utterly Absurd.
KD is stepping into dessert for the first time ever – because KD’s iconic cheesy flavour and ultimate craveability shouldn’t be limited to dinner time. Introducing: KD Mac & Cheesecake, a first-of-its-kind sweet and savoury creation that transforms the signature cheesy KD flavour Canadians know and love into a deliciously craveable treat.
A chance meeting at a marathon in Hong Kong brought a professional Kenyan runner to rural southern Wisconsin. Dennis Beggs, a Leyden native and farmer, met Kenyan farmer Betty Chepkwny at a race in Hong Kong.
A man pulled over after swerving all over the road claimed the alcohol he consumed shouldn’t count because it was the "the blood of Christ". The 53-year-old man was pulled over in Ravensbourne Rd, Dunedin, at 6.45pm on Saturday, Acting Senior Sergeant Iain Notman said.
A colossal new sea predator named Tylosaurus rex has been identified from fossils found in Texas, revealing a brutal 43-foot-long hunter that ruled ancient oceans 80 million years ago. The discovery not only introduces one of the biggest mosasaurs ever known, but also shakes up long-standing ideas about how these marine reptiles evolved.
Christopher Storm received roughly $500 a month in survivor benefits as a teenager after his father died. Now the government says he owes almost $8,000.
Former first lady Jill Biden said she was "frightened" when watching her husband, former President Joe Biden, in his first and only debate performance during the 2024 presidential election and thought he was having a stroke on stage. The broadcaster has released an excerpt of the interview.
For nearly 10 years, Eric Poulin has been having episodes where he seems drunk — without taking even a sip of alcohol. The Nova Scotia man has auto-brewery syndrome.
A Hertfordshire holidaymaker is seeking compensation after a hot coffee cup fell in his lap and left him with "life-changing" burns on his penis. Nicholas Gibbs was flying back to Heathrow from Las Vegas with his partner, Claire, in December 2025, when the lidless drink slid into his lap from a tray table.
New legislation aims to integrate banks into Russia’s air defences using jamming systems and trained employees. Russian lawmakers have passed a bill to allow trained bank employees to shoot down Ukrainian drones amid an increase in the number of attacks.
New legislation aims to integrate banks into Russia’s air defences using jamming systems and trained employees. Russian lawmakers have passed a bill to allow trained bank employees to shoot down Ukrainian drones amid an increase in the number of attacks.
The Mariposa County Sheriff’s Office announced Wednesday morning that it has apprehended Jonathan Mishael Bays, a fugitive who had been wanted for attempted murder. Bays, 41, is suspected of attacking a man with a samurai-style sword on Saturday at the Creekside Apartments in Mariposa.
One of the fastest-growing kink categories is gaining more and more traction every day - and experts claim it ‘taps into more than just arousal’. JOI stands for ‘jerk off instruction’ and, like it says on the tin, it features someone on your screen instructing you on how to masturbate, and advising the viewer what to do, when and how.
Following Tuesday’s punishing Republican primary runoff to determine Talarico’s opponent in November’s general election, top Trump advisor Stephen Miller took off the gloves and delivered a cheap shot. In response, the Democratic Party’s official social media accounts fired back a blistering — and similarly lowbrow — five-word response: "shut up you ugly fuck."
Enhanced Games organizers said on Wednesday they will offer a $10 million bonus to any man who breaks Usain Bolt's 100 metres world record at their 2027 event. The announcement followed the inaugural Enhanced Games, held on Sunday at Resorts World Las Vegas, where athletes produced one swimming "world record" and 21 personal bests.
Timothy Chandler, 23, pleaded guilty to delay or destruction of the mail. He faces up to five years in prison for delay or destruction of mail.
The base's perimeter may be marked by hopping "MoonFall" drones, and new moon rovers built by AstroLab and Lunar Outpost will carry astronauts around the site. NASA is definitely thinking big on the moon.
The Centers for Disease Control and Prevention sent an "urgent request" to its employees seeking volunteers to help screen passengers arriving from Congo and Uganda for signs of Ebola, according to an internal email shared by a U.S. Health and Human Services official with USA TODAY. The request comes as the Trump administration's sweeping cuts in the federal workforce have reduced the agency's staff by nearly 30% since last year.
A Wisconsin man accused of fatally stabbing his mother more than 40 times allegedly told police he stopped at Dairy Queen before carrying out the gruesome attack. Michael J. Hurlburt, 27, of Menomonie, was charged Tuesday in the death of his mother, 56-year-old Lisa M. Bragg-Hurlburt, who was killed Friday at her home in Eau Claire, Wisconsin.
A traffic citation issued to a woman who said she was accused of holding a phone in a hand she does not have has been dismissed. Court records show the citation was dismissed at the request of the Palm Beach County Sheriff’s Office deputy who issued it.
Police are investigating an odd shooting in Scottsbluff, Nebraska where a dog is accused of pulling the trigger of a shotgun, injuring a woman. The woman was hit in the arm by the shotgun round and taken to a local hospital for treatment.
Police are investigating an odd shooting in Scottsbluff, Nebraska. A dog is accused of pulling the trigger of a shotgun, injuring a woman who was stopped at a nearby traffic light.
A driver has been prosecuted after an incident outside a busy Essex train station led to an unexpected court case. Jamie Spence, 52, was handed a criminal conviction and ordered to pay £266 after sounding his van horn to get a friend’s attention near Braintree railway station.
The Marine Corps hopes that a modified version of the nearly two-decade-old hit video game Call of Duty 4: Modern Warfare can help newly promoted sergeants level up as leaders. A group of researchers from Virginia Tech and the University of Memphis developed a training adaptation of the genre-defining game to help teach students in the Sergeants School at the Marine Corps University in Quantico, Va.
A man pulled over after swerving all over the road claimed the alcohol he consumed shouldn’t count because it was the "the blood of Christ". The 53-year-old man was pulled over in Ravensbourne Rd, Dunedin, at 6.45pm on Saturday, Acting Senior Sergeant Iain Notman said.
Former first lady Jill Biden said she was "frightened" by her husband Joe Biden's 2024 debate performance and thought he was having a stroke. "I was frightened, because I had never ever seen Joe like that before or since. Never," Jill Biden told CBS News Sunday Morning's Rita Braver in an interview airing Sunday on CBS.